THIS MEANS WAR (Rated PG-13)

Is Reese Witherspoon the poster girl for America’s cinematic sweetheart? If so, that’s as good a reason as any for her to be at the center of an odd love triangle.

You can’t miss the imagery in the large posters for “This Means War,” where the perky blonde beauty stands between two hunky guys who appear poised for what the title implies.

The film’s concept is right out of Mad magazine, with the Spy vs. Spy theme taken to its logical conclusion when two CIA agents employ their secret agent skills to a purpose other than national security.

That’s right, expensive surveillance equipment and the skills acquired from dangerous missions in the field are put to the service of helping two lustful secret agents to pursue the same woman.

The competition starts innocently enough, which is more than one can say for the film’s opening scene, a wild shootout at a nightclub perched on top of a Hong Kong skyscraper.

Agents Tuck (Tom Hardy) and FDR (Chris Pine), dressed like the Blues Brothers, botch a mission to take down Eurotrash terrorist Heinrich (Til Schweiger), instead killing his brother and a slew of henchmen.

The violent encounter, where Tuck and FDR get carried away, results in some bad press and reassignment to desk jobs for the duo at the Los Angeles field office.

Bored with menial tasks, FDR and Tuck, who happen to be best buddies, decide it might be a good time to deal with their love lives.

That’s not a problem for the charismatic ladies man FDR, but divorced dad Tuck is a bit rusty and unsure of himself. He decides to give online dating a try.

Meanwhile, Reese Witherspoon’s Lauren is fully committed to her job promoting consumer products and has stopped dating since being dumped.

Lauren’s best friend Trish (Chelsea Handler, in full loudmouth mode), who’s married, wants to live vicariously by signing up Lauren for online dating.

Not surprisingly, Tuck and Lauren find each other in cyberspace and arrange to go on a dinner date. Then, Lauren and FDR find each other in a video store, of all places.

The sparks don’t fly at first between Lauren and FDR. His oily charm is too eager. She parries and spurns his casual banter with spunky retorts. Immediately, FDR is hooked and stalks her at a product-testing focus group.

One day Lauren is lonely, and the next she finds herself the object of attention from two handsome suitors, each with his own special appeal.

Thus the fierce romantic competition begins, because Tuck and FDR soon discover they are after the same woman, even though Lauren is blissfully unaware of their relationship.

It’s at this point that the two CIA agents violate all agency protocols by engaging in high-tech surveillance of Lauren’s every move, tapping her cell phone and planting bugs in her apartment.

To make matters worse, Tuck and FDR enlist underlings in the “covert” mission, having everyone believe that the pretty blonde is a threat to national security. Where’s profiling when you need it?

Though the rivalry between two best pals is supposed to be friendly, it takes a more heated turn in a battle of extreme one-upmanship, going so far as having the two of them destroy a restaurant during one altercation.

Back on the job front, Heinrich and his goons are looking for retribution against FDR and Tuck for the Hong Kong fiasco.

“This Means War” reaches a ridiculous climax with a wild car chase and shootout between the agents and Heinrich on an unfinished freeway overpass.

There’s a lot of funny stuff in this mish-mash film that awkwardly merges romantic comedy with high-octane action. Still, the film may not be the great turn-on for many.

Director McG (“Charlie’s Angels”) is not known for subtlety, and so it is not surprising that he had to spice up the romantic comedy with guns blazing and things blowing up.

HOLLYWOOD MUSEUM EXHIBIT

In case you are visiting Hollywood any time before the end of April, you could do better than taking a bus ride to see the homes of Hollywood stars.

The Hollywood Museum, located only blocks from the famous Graumann’s Chinese Theater, has a special exhibit called “And The Winner Is ...”

Celebrating the award season, this exhibit showcases the largest selection of costumes and props from over twenty films and televisions shows nominated for awards.

You can see great authentic stuff from nominated films like “The Artist,” “The Descendants,” and “Midnight in Paris,” to name only a few.

Pee-Wee Herman memorabilia is also on display, including his famous red bike from his “Big Adventure” film. I don’t think it was nominated for any category.

The best of all, at least to my thinking, was the Rat Pack display, celebrating the original “Ocean’s 11,” and heavily invested in Frank Sinatra memorabilia.

The Hollywood Museum is located in the historic Max Factor Building on the corner of Hollywood and Highland.

Max Factor, the legend of movie makeup, worked his magic on motion picture stars starting in 1935. Displays give a peek into that fairytale world.

Tim Riley writes film and television reviews for Lake County News.

LAKEPORT, Calif. – Lake County Arts Council members are invited to display artwork at the Memorial Day Craft Fair on Sunday, May 26, sponsored by the Kiwanis Club of Lakeport.

This event is an annual event held at the Natural High grounds, located at 810 N. Main St., Lakeport, directly across from St. Mary's Catholic Church.

The Kiwanis Club is offering the space free of charge. This event is open only to members of Lake County Arts Council who have paintings and/or wall hanging type art work to display.

There is limited space, so reservations are on a first-come, first-serve basis.

Artists are responsible for setting up and taking down a professional display. Bring your easels, display racks, tables and more. Artists are encouraged to hold painting demonstrations throughout the day.

Set up starts at 10 a.m. Sunday, May 26. Artists must have their art ready for 11 a.m. viewing. Takedown is 4 p.m.

The area reserved for this event is under the overhang alongside the Natural High building.

The Lake County Arts Council will have an information table at the event, and all artists participating are asked to help – either with set up, takedown or during the event with hosting the table.

Any sales that result from this display are private sales.

For a participation agreement and to reserve a space, please contact Judy Cardinale at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

KELSEYVILLE, Calif. – On Sunday, Feb. 12 – Abraham Lincoln's birthday – David Burgess brought his version of truth in guitar music to a small but enthusiastic audience at Kelseyville's Galilee Lutheran Church.

The concert was presented by Clear Lake Performing Arts, whose usual venue is Lakeport's Soper-Reese Community Theatre, but due to a conflict in dates, Galilee generously offered its picturesque church as a substitute.

Burgess, in making his third appearance in Lake County, chose this area to kick off a tour of West Coast cities.

In earlier appearances here he had concentrated on the music of Spain, with between-number discourses on the early development of the guitar and guitar music in the Mediterranean area.

This time, after spending nearly a decade studying the music of Brazil, he tailored his performance exclusively to the music of that country.

He explained that while most guitars have six or eight strings, the instruments played in Brazil usually include a seventh, providing for an extra bass line.

“Street musicians,” Burgess explained, “found they could perform with one fewer players with the addition of the bass string.”

He opened his program with “Sampa,” a piece written by Caetano Veloso as a protest against the military dictatorship ruling Brazil in the 1960s.

This was followed by two pieces by Ernesto Nazareth, who first conceived of the idea of combining the rhythms of the polka and tango, to achieve a uniquely Brazilian sound.

Burgess next transition was into what he called “The Good Old Days” of the music of Brazil, specifically the 1930s, headlined by the single-name composer Garato, who toured extensively with the Latin movie star Carmen Miranda and is also recognized as the originator of the popular Bossa Nova beat.

He ended the first half of his performance with music written by Raphael Rabello, one of Brazil's most popular and prolific composers in spite of his death at the early age of just 33.

Following intermission, with refreshments served by the ladies of the CLPA Auxiliary, Burgess returned with additional music from Brazil's contemporary writers including Armando Neves and Vinicius de Moraes, the latter being a well-known poet who turned his talents to music, including writing portions of the music for the movie “Black Orpheus,” with it's hugely popular theme “Cast Your Fate to the Winds.”

This was followed by two pieces from Brazil’s most popular current musical artist youthful Yamandu' Costa, including his “Samba Pro Rafa,” written as an homage to Raphael Rabello, with spectacular fingering by Burgess.

The concert concluded with two pieces from perhaps the most famed of all Brazilian guitarists and Bossa Nova practitioners, the late Antonio Carlos Jobim.

After the concert local classical guitarist Travis Rinker met briefly with Burgess to discuss the finer points of their respective instruments, as did guitar students Kayla Garcia and Sabre Bruffy.

Burgess also conducted a special clinic on Monday morning for music students at Lower Lake High School.

The next CLPA concert will take place on Mothers Day, May 2, at the Soper-Reese Community Theatre in Lakeport, and feature the full Lake County Symphony, as well as the CLPA Youth Orchestra.

At a time when a relationship is falling apart, sometimes the news of its failure doesn’t come out of a mouth but from gestures. Claudia Emerson, who lives in Virginia, here captures a telling moment.

Eight Ball

It was fifty cents a game

beneath exhausted ceiling fans,

the smoke’s old spiral. Hooded lights

burned distant, dull. I was tired, but you

insisted on one more, so I chalked

the cue — the bored blue — broke, scratched.

It was always possible

for you to run the table, leave me

nothing. But I recall the easy

shot you missed, and then the way

we both studied, circling — keeping

what you had left me between us.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright ©2005 by Claudia Emerson, whose most recent book of poetry is Figure Studies, Louisiana State University Press, 2008. Poem reprinted from Late Wife, Louisiana State University Press, 2005, by permission of Claudia Emerson and the publisher. Introduction copyright © 2012 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. They do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

JOURNEY 2: THE MYSTERIOUS ISLAND (Rated PG)

When I first learned of the upcoming movie “Journey 2,” I wondered what became of the first “Journey,” such that it did not ring a bell.

Only upon digesting the complete title of “Journey 2: The Mysterious Island” was my mind nudged ever so slightly by the thought of Jules Verne.

The problem, which remains for this film as well, is that the first film, titled “Journey to the Center of the Earth” and released in 2008, is entirely forgettable.

“Journey 1,” starring Brendan Fraser, now nowhere to be found and not even lost on a mysterious island, was a Jules Verne-type adventure, one that may have pleased kids.

The sequel is equally designed to satisfy the adolescent filmgoers, such that the teen hero remains Josh Hutcherson’s Sean, who’s been given permission by his mother (Kristin Davis) for another globe-trotting quest.

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, who flexes his pectorals as if he were hanging out at Venice Beach, plays the role of Hank, stepdad to the peripatetic Sean.

In what is expected to be a bonding experience, Hank takes Sean on a journey to a mysterious island, following secret clues that Sean believes Jules Verne left behind.

Curiosity runs in the family because it is apparent that Sean’s missing grandfather Alexander (Michael Caine) was so obsessed with the writings of Jules Verne that he invented the familial craving for wanderlust.

Once in the South Pacific, Hank, in what appears to be a dubious idea, hires goofy, excitable helicopter pilot Gabato (Luis Guzman) to locate the island.

On the upside, at least for Sean, is that Gabato’s pretty daughter Kailani (Vanessa Hudgens) tags along for the ride. This, of course, sets up the film’s only love interest subplot.

Meanwhile, a crash landing on an island immediately brings to mind that “Journey 2” could detour into a missing episode of “Lost.”

Alas, that is not to be, for our intrepid travelers are exposed to the mystery of an upside-down world, where elephants are small and bees and lizards are giant prehistoric beasts.

Naturally, grandpa Alexander, who was busy sending out radio signals with his coordinates, is found on this exotic South Pacific island, which is notable for the fact that it is rapidly sinking into the sea like Atlantis.

The soon-to-be extinct tropical paradise is a wonder of special effects, none more thrilling than watching Sean riding bareback on a giant bee.

Since the story is family-friendly, “Journey 2” lacks the inherent menace of prehistoric threats found in “Jurassic Park,” though giant iguanas appear threatening.

To be sure, “Journey 2” is a formulaic adventure story relying heavily on special effects, which is as satisfying as a giant tub of popcorn and a big cone of cotton candy. It’s fun in the moment for the adolescent crowd.

The pairing of Dwayne Johnson and Michael Caine is interesting for some of the back-and-forth dialogue. The film benefits from the presence of these two titans of natural charm.

One good reason not to be late to the screening of this film is that it should be preceded by a funny animated short called “Daffy’s Rhapsody,” an adventure with Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd.

Oh, just one more thing, you should know that both the Warner Brothers cartoon and the feature film are in 3-D.

DVD RELEASE UPDATE

This column has often extolled the virtues of British television programs that may find their way to BBC America and eventually to a DVD release.

“Northern Lights: The Complete Collection,” featuring all 12 episodes and two movies of this comedy series, is being released on DVD by Acorn Media, to go-to outfit for British imports.

The series followed lifelong friends and rivals Colin Armstrong (Robson Green) and Howard Scott (Mark Benton) on a hilarious series of misadventures – really classic British wackiness.

As schoolboys, Colin and Howard fought over girls, soccer teams and clothes. Now married men in their thirties, their competition has shifted to more important, if mundane, matters like jobs and cars.

The comedy comes from insane rivalry of one-upmanship, where they try to outdo each other, even with Christmas decorations. Meanwhile, their long-suffering wives endure the collateral damage.

“Northern Lights” is the kind of classic comedy that “The Guardian” rightfully called “warm and witty comedy drama.”

Tim Riley writes film and television reviews for Lake County News.

LAKE COUNTY, Calif. – Three young fiddlers from Lake County made a fantastic showing at the recent Cloverdale Fiddle Contest.

Fiddlers travel from many parts of northern California to attend this large contest and there is much competition.

Rafael Contreras, 8, of Lower Lake played with such energy and precision that he received cheers from the audience and won first place in the Pee Wee division.

He won a medal and a cash prize, and even got his picture taken with the mayor of Cloverdale.

He is the student of Sue Condit and is a member of the Konocti Fiddle Club and the Clear Lake Performing Arts Youth Orchestra. He was accompanied by Sue Condit and Andi Skelton on guitar.

Clayton Rudiger and Lars Tisell entered in the Junior Division (13-17) and played amazing sets of three tunes each.

Both boys made the finals to play in the second round. Lars placed fourth and Clayton sixth, with only a few points difference in their scores. They also teamed up to enter the Twin Fiddle class and did not make the finals, but played well.

These fiddle contests offer a great challenge to fiddlers, since each contestant must be prepared to play a possible six to seven tunes in each division.

In addition, the Twin division required a possible four to five tunes. Tunes must be memorized and cannot be repeated, so it represents much preparation by these talented contestants.

Clayton was accompanied by Mark Rudiger and Lars by Austin and Jeanine Ison (guitar/accordion).

Clayton and Lars are students of Andi Skelton and are also members of the Konocti Fiddle Club and the CLPA Youth Orchestra. Clayton is the current concertmaster of the orchestra.

These fiddlers are all members of the Konocti Fiddle Club, which is a Lake County group for all ages and all levels of fiddle players.

This group plays lively danceable folk tunes at festivals and other venues in Lake County. This group also works with Clear Lake Performing Arts to present in-school educational assemblies.

For info about the Fiddle Club, call Andi Skelton at 707-279-4336.

Most of the young fiddlers also play in the CLPA Youth Orchestra which will be playing at the Lake County Symphony Concert on May 13 and presenting a Spring Concert on June 10 at the Soper Reese Theatre.

Clear Lake Performing Arts is offering string instruction to all levels and ages in this county-wide orchestra.

If you are interested in joining the group or just want to learn to play a string instrument, call conductor Sue Condit at 707-533-9431.