Host Phil Mathewson did some poetry and sang some original songs. Lorna Sue Sides recited some of her more sensuous poems and Joanne Bateni read an anti-war poem.

Our youngest performer was 6 year old Madison Dessele, who played the piano for about a minute and covered her entire repertoire. She just started taking lessons and we expect great things from her in the future. Her dad then played his guitar and sang a few tunes.

Scotty McNeil sang his “Kelseyville” song and played a little “Ode to Joy” by Beethoven on the house piano.

Our resident magician, Phillip Martin, made a late appearance and forgot his famous cards. Cherie Holden from Watershed Books saved the day by lending a deck. Thank you, Cherie. Martin also tried some psychic readings and some coin tricks.

Tom Nixon performed some of his original songs including “Going up to Clearlake” and then accompanied Anthony, who played the musical saw. Anthony, the saw player, explained that musical saws are usually accompanied by other instruments so Phil and Tom played along with him before he did his solo. Thanks to everybody who came by.

Don’t forget the Thursday variety show at 4 p.m. All acts are welcome.

Cafe Victoria is located at 301 Main St. in Lakeport, telephone 263-1210.

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The new “Indiana Jones” movie can’t arrive soon enough. Lately, I have seen more than my share of romantic comedies, which has not necessarily been a bad thing. For instance, new films coming out now include “What Happens in Vegas” and “Speed Racer.” The latter film, a glossy mix of animation and live-action, is geared to a younger audience. On the other hand, “What Happens in Vegas” takes full comedic advantage of Sin City’s marketing campaign, turning the famous slogan on its ear.

Gleeful debauchery and insane indulgence aside, some things just don’t stay behind in Vegas, particularly when a marriage ceremony at a tawdry wedding chapel carries the full weight of a binding legal entanglement.

Unfortunate circumstances bring two very unlikely people together in miserable matrimony. But first, “What Happens in Vegas” introduces the two central characters who decide for vastly different reasons to vacation in Vegas.

Jack Fuller (Ashton Kutcher) is the ultimate slacker and party dude who is fired by his own father (Treat Williams) from the family’s furniture manufacturing. His polar opposite is Joy McNally (Cameron Diaz), a buttoned-up commodities trader on Wall Street, who gets dumped by her fiance at her own surprise birthday party.

In a coincidence that only happens in the movies, Jack takes his best buddy Steve “Hater” Hader (Rob Corddry) on the trip, where they check into a Vegas hotel only to find that the room is already occupied by Joy and her best friend Tipper (Lake Bell). After resolving this unhappy arrangement, Jack and Steve convince the two girls to go out for a night on the town, which is facilitated by the concierge’s eagerness to comp their festivities.

This quartet of partygoers is a mismatched group for many reasons. A second-rate lawyer, Steve fancies himself a ladies man, even if his charisma barely surpasses that of a serial killer. His obnoxious behavior finds its equal in Tipper’s unrelenting hostility. The rowdy weekend becomes a random blur of frantic activity lubricated by massive amounts of alcohol. When the dust settles in the early morning, Joy and Jack painfully discover they tied the knot in a ceremony witnessed by drunken revelers.

Before the two vacationing New Yorkers can figure out how to quickly dissolve their union, Jack uses Joy’s last quarter to play a slot machine which incredibly pays out a cool $3 million. Now an impending marital split will be complicated by sizable community assets.

Back in Manhattan, a cranky judge (Dennis Miller) decides to sentence the bickering pair to “six months of hard marriage.” By freezing the prize booty, the judge forces the irresponsible couple to prove that they done everything possible to make the impromptu marriage work. The first one to fail in this mission will lose all the loot to the other.

Since Joy has to move into Jack’s messy bachelor pad, it’s going to be a very trying battle of the sexes. Not surprisingly, Jack and Joy will do their best to sabotage the other, and of course, their friends Steve and Tipper will become willing and supportive combatants on each side. They even have to attend marriage counseling with Queen Latifah. But many tricks are employed to undermine the marriage. Joy rounds up a bevy of beautiful women in order to lead Jack astray at a party. Jack tries to get her snooty ex-fiance Mason (Jason Sudeikis) to woo her again.

“What Happens in Vegas” thrives on the formulaic approach to romantic comedy. Very little happens that is unexpected or terribly surprising, but nevertheless there are plenty of laughs. While Joy is trying hard to move up the corporate ladder, it is the laid-back Jack who manages to impress her demanding boss (Dennis Farina) on a company retreat. Is it any wonder where these mismatched lovebirds will end up? Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz have the right chemistry for their respective roles of wayward slacker and uptight professional.

DVD RELEASE UPDATE

I think I mentioned last week that the weird stuff ends up on DVDs. If you liked horror comedies such as “Shaun of the Dead” and “An American Werewolf in London,” then “Botched” could be your cup of tea.

Gore and violence run rampant, but much of it is so over-the-top that it seems calculated to induce laughs, at least the nervous kind.

Stephen Dorff stars as two-bit professional thief sent to Russia to steal a priceless antique cross locked in a safe on the penthouse floor of a Moscow skyscraper. During the heist, Dorff and his thuggish Russian henchmen are trapped by the police and forced to take hostages.

Unfortunately for them, they seek refuge on the 13th floor, where things get really dicey. Decapitations and impalements are just part of the fun. “Botched” may be destined for cult status.

Tim Riley writes film and television reviews for Lake County News.

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The master of ceremony's work schedule prompted the change which should be permanent at least for now.

Check with Phillip Martin, 928-5543, or email him to get on his mailing list at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. Hope to see you there.

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Easily dismissed as just one more chick flick in a recent spate of similar efforts, “Made of Honor” puts a rather obvious spin on the formulaic romantic comedy, even though subversively tilting its action to a male point of view.

To be sure, any film geared to a wedding ceremony is almost certainly a lure to the female audience, unless of course that film stars Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson as freeloading bachelors.

This time around, the handsome Patrick Dempsey, apparently called McDreamy for his role in TV’s “Grey’s Anatomy,” is the pivotal character in the oddly titular role. Women may not mind that he’s a cad.

In a strange role reversal, Dempsey’s Tom is introduced at the film’s beginning a decade ago as the campus Lothario, eager to bed every coed with the zeal of an oversexed frat boy. Crawling under the covers with a college girl in a case of mistaken identity, Tom gets his comeuppance from an unwilling partner, Michelle Monaghan’s Hannah, a sober-minded individual who will not be randomly seduced by a drunken partygoer.

Oddly enough, Tom and Hannah manage to become best friends, a platonic relationship that has the feel of a close bond between brother and sister. Fast forwarding to the present day, Tom and Hannah spend time together in New York City as friends supporting each other. It seems like a one-sided affair, with Tom usually confessing his unbendable rules of dating, such as not having two consecutive dates or calling a potential date within 24 hours of a chance encounter.

Tom’s social life is revealed as a revolving door of sexual conquests, where impossibly beautiful women practically fling themselves at his feet. At this point, the film is more like a male fantasy, because real life is unlike that, even for the most adept womanizers.

For reasons unexplained, Tom has more magnetism and sex appeal than James Bond and has had more bedroom triumphs than Wilt Chamberlain. If he kept a little black book, it would be the size of a Manhattan telephone directory. In his rare spare time, Tom hangs out with a bunch of buddies who, with the exception of the obligatory married guy (Kadeem Hardison), would be hard-pressed to get any date on a Saturday night.

What Tom, in his state of arrested development, has failed to realize is that the girl of his dreams has been the one constant in his life. When Hannah goes overseas to Scotland on a six-week business trip, it dawns on this slow learner that his life is empty without her.

He knows he doesn’t want to end up like his father (Sydney Pollack), who’s marrying his sixth trophy wife while fully realizing that a pre-nuptial agreement is certain to be tested in relatively short order. In between the usual trysts, he mopes around because Hannah is gone, calling her often in the middle of the night. He resolves to reveal his true feelings upon her return, intending to propose matrimony.

Hannah’s eventual homecoming is fraught with a great surprise, but only to Tom. Anyone else would see this disaster coming, when Hannah announces that she’s engaged to a handsome and wealthy Scotsman, heir to the family’s distillery business. The aristocratic Colin McMurray (Kevin McKidd) lives in a castle on a scenic lake. He’s also tremendously athletic, almost too good to be true.

Tom can’t bear the thought of losing Hannah, especially when she plans to move overseas. When Hannah asks Tom to be her “maid of honor,” he reluctantly agrees to fill this curious role, expecting his best chance to sabotage the wedding is from within.

Naturally, Hannah’s girlfriends are aghast at Tom’s selection for the matrimonial honor. One of these friends harbors a bitter resentment of a one-night stand gone horribly wrong, and she goes to great lengths to disrupt Tom’s essential role of bridal planner.

Meanwhile, Tom’s basketball-playing buddies constantly razz him, while offering some misguided advice. Culture shock sets in when Tom and the wedding party end up in Scotland, and the snooty McMurray clan is somewhat aghast at Tom’s gender-bending role. There’s even an ongoing gag about a clueless grandmother mistaking a sex toy for a necklace.

“Made of Honor” is so thoroughly predictable that it is virtually impossible to find anything surprising or even remotely ingenious. That’s not to say there aren’t some funny things happening, or that some of dialogue isn’t zippy and humorous.

The breezy quality of the comedy on display probably has much to do with the nice chemistry between Tom Dempsey and Michelle Monaghan, both of them likable even though only one has the heart and character worthy of that positive trait.

DVD RELEASE UPDATE

We can use this space to report on the odd and strange in the film business.

You can’t get much weirder than “Teeth,” a story galvanized by the vagina dentata mythology in which a young girl develops choppers in the most unexpected place.

A jaw-dropping horror film (to coin a gruesome phrase), “Teeth” stars newcomer Jess Weixler and John Hensley in a twisted tale of female empowerment, which the Hollywood Reporter called “the most alarming cautionary tale for men,” a description that one would be hard-pressed to improve upon when you consider “Fatal Attraction” so greatly unnerved the male audience.

The teenage star is so innocent that she is not even aware of her own basic bodily functions, and discovers quite by accident that she is anatomically very unique. Watch this DVD at your own peril.

Tim Riley writes film and television reviews for Lake County News.

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By Lee Torliatt

George Washington may never have slept here, but Luther Burbank definitely took a snooze or two in Lake County.

The mineral springs of Lake County became an attraction for vacationers from Sonoma County and elsewhere as early as the 1860s and the fun continued well into the 1950s.

One of the most popular places was Hoberg's, founded by Gustav and Mathilde Hoberg late in the 19th century. Donna Hoberg, a descendant, does a good job of mixing pictures and text to show how the many resorts of the area developed. She notes that Burbank, Santa Rosa's noted plant wizard, got away from the hustle and bustle of Sonoma County several times in the 1920s, staying in what was known as the Spring cabin with his wife and niece. 

Things did not always go well for resorts at the Lake. The spacious Witter Hotel, built for $250,000 in 1906, suffered financial tremors after the San Francisco earthquake and was sold for $15,000 ten years later. Shades of our current real estate shakes. 

Hoberg's, a destination for many residents of Sonoma County and the greater Bay Area, fared better. Governor Earl Warren, movie star Lee Carrillo and World War II hero Hap Arnold of Sonoma joined in the fun. Name bandleaders included Freddy Martin, Xavier Cugat and Tommy Dorsey; singer Tennessee Ernie Ford dropped by to sing "Sixteen Tons" and play a round of golf or two. Sal Carson and his orchestra regularly provided dancing under the stars starting in 1945.

Ozzie Coulthart, with frequent blasts from his trumpet, is remembered as being the "resort character," acting as a combination emcee and recreation director in the 1950s.

(Torliatt is editor of the Sonoma County Historian, the quarterly journal of the Sonoma County Historical Society.)

There’s a new chick-flick at the local Cineplex where the action is set in Philadelphia, as in Pennsylvania’s major city. Merely coincidental, the film arrives on the heels of that state’s big primary, but Hillary Clinton is nowhere to be found in a venue that still suggests “Rocky.” Rather, this comedic adventure is called “Baby Mama,” starring two female stars of “Saturday Night Live.”

Now, I have to admit, sheepishly, that I laughed at many of the jokes in this female-oriented comedy. As a result, I have scheduled a doctor’s appointment to have my testosterone levels checked, just in case I am precipitously on the verge on some inexplicable male menopausal meltdown. At least I am not crying during soap operas, mainly because I don’t watch any.

Perched for a long time as a cast member and co-anchor of “Weekend Update” on “Saturday Night Live,” Tina Fey has made her mark in another comedy series on NBC, while Amy Poehler continues on for a seventh season in the late night weekly comedy show. Together, Fey and Poehler have great chemistry as an odd couple as mismatched as Oscar and Felix. Fey’s Kate Holbrook is a career-driven executive at an organic market chain.

Financially secure, she lives in a swank Philadelphia apartment that reflects her fastidious nature. Having put her personal life on the back burner, the unmarried Kate suddenly realizes her biological clock is ticking. After visiting several sperm banks, Kate discovers that she is infertile, and therefore, decides to visit the surrogacy center run by Chaffee Bicknell (Sigourney Weaver).

The solution for her wish to have a child is realized by the availability of Angie Ostrowiski (Amy Poehler) to become the surrogate mom. Free-spirited Angie is the suburban Philly equivalent of trailer park trash. When interviewing for the surrogate position, Angie shows up with her equally trashy common-law husband Carl (Dax Shepard), a deadbeat who’s anxious to take advantage of Kate’s generous cash offer for services rendered.

Angie is hardly the ideal candidate for motherhood, as she indulges in activities that should be off limits, such as smoking, drinking and eating junk food while watching the worst of daytime TV. Angie is one fistfight away from being a guest on the “Jerry Springer Show.”

Entering the nesting mode, Kate buys all the appropriate child-care books and childbirth DVDs, enrolling herself and Angie in a birthing class. But Kate is consumed with her work schedule, which includes satisfying the desires of her New Age hippie boss Barry (Steve Martin, in a hilarious role) to open a flagship store in an area ripe for gentrification.

Yet, Kate’s plans for a perfect pregnancy are turned upside down when Angie leaves Carl and moves into Kate’s apartment, seeing that she has no money or place to live. Now that they have to share the tight quarters of an apartment, it is inevitable that the friction between two very dissimilar characters will erupt into pandemonium.

While wiseguy doorman Oscar (Romany Malco) watches with bemusement, the comings and goings of the anxious mother-to-be and the flighty surrogate create a real sideshow. Though Angie is given to many bottom-feeding tendencies, including the inappropriate use of a bathroom sink, Kate begins the inevitable mellowing process, which soon has her taking up a romantic interest in local smoothies bar owner Rob (Greg Kinnear), an erstwhile lawyer who is consumed with an unnatural bitterness towards big competitor Jamba Juice.

Even guys will detect the predictable plot twists of female rivalry that runs rampant through “Baby Mama,” but still there is a good deal of enjoyable humor, mainly due to the wisecracks and banter between the leading ladies. “Baby Mama” employs plenty of broad gags, delivering a tidy sense of comedic convenience that won’t leave a lasting impression. At the bottom line, it’s fun but not a must-see comedy.

DVD RELEASE UPDATE

I think there’s a whole new industry churning out horror films from the Far East, and not just Hong Kong. But if it weren’t for DVDs, we’d probably not even know about gruesome cinema from Thailand.

The latest to hit our shores is the aptly-named “Sick Nurses,” a gory, violent film set in the hallways of a run-down Bangkok hospital.

“Sick Nurses” follows a clandestine team of nurses and a chief surgeon who sell human body parts and whole bodies on the black market for a profit.

When one of the nurses threatens to expose the operation, she is instantly attacked, killed and wrapped in a body bag to be sold by her cohorts.

A bloodthirsty spirit, she emerges from the dead seeking revenge for her untimely death, attacking each victim and forcing them to perform violent acts against themselves and others.

I hope someone will release an anniversary version of “The Sound of Music,” if only to balance the equation.

Tim Riley writes film and television reviews for Lake County News.

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